There are times when a person is full of doubt. Unable to fathom the sown seeds, the person starts to hesitate, fear and fails to reflect upon his own thought processes. He starts worrying beyond apprehensions. It starts affecting his daily life and takes a toll on his social and professional performances. The person slowly loses himself into a drowsiness called self-doubt.
So what is self-doubt and why does it creep into our lives and destroys our motivation? What can be done to overcome the seeds of doubt?
- What
is 'Self Doubt'?
It is that phase of life when you are unsure of what you want to
achieve. You are hesitant in your approach. An excuse to not commit to
anything.
We are usually full of doubt when we lack confidence. It maybe
because of lack of will, lack of skill or because of your halfhearted takes
towards an objective. It can also be a prolonged period of influence. You might
have been involved in a group which has a depletive take on your process of
thought. The process is also a direct outcome of a bad health. Lack of sleep
and lack of motivation can impact your thinking process. It can bring out your
negative side, with a negative thinking. This in fact affects your way of life.
- When
is a person inflicted with it?
Self-doubt can also be inflicted by a series of processes, which
includes lack of appreciation. There are times when people have an obnoxious
approach towards something or someone. This approach in long term turns to bite
you, harm you, and inflict an injury upon you. It forms a vicious circle.
Without proper guidance or reflection upon your thought processes you cannot
escape it.
A person with self-doubting apprehensions has a viscous pattern.
An excerpt being "I think I have always under-performed. Of all the
skills, abilities I had and have, I ended up as a trash; I don’t compare myself
with others. I believe in competing with myself, and somewhere in the race I am
losing my own peace. I am losing myself; I don’t understand what people believe
or expect of me; I don’t expect bad of people why do they think poorly of me; I
don’t believe in interfering into people’s lives. I keep my stuff to myself and
I expect others to do the same; I don’t have the confidence. The thing I
was so proud of is the thing that I am lacking the most."
When a person is aware of his abilities, he strives to reach his goal and work hard. No matter how many times he fails, he continues the work. This stands true for career and social objectives. When the same scenario befalls a doubtful mind it tends to fail. This, I guess is one of the root causes.
- Doubt
is not always caused by lacking confidence; it can be vice a versa. Can a
doubting mind take prudent decisions?
I doubt myself that's why I lack confidence or lacking confidence
causes self-doubt. I doubt myself because I feel lonely or I doubt myself
that's why I feel lonely. I don’t believe in sharing things with people or I
don't share things with people that why they don't believe in me. I don't
socialise because I I fail or I fail because I don't socialise. A confused or
hesitating mind cannot differentiate white from black or black from white.
- What can be done to deal with 'Self Doubt'?
There is neither definite cause nor a singled out answer.
Nonetheless answers do exist. Some simple solutions are- Just go for it: Thinking too much may have its own consequences. You
may not know something until you try it. If you have an idea, then go for
it. Give it your all. You can't run unless you learn to walk & you
can't walk unless you learn to stand first'.
- Avail Alternatives: Availing alternatives will not do any harm. If
your platform A' doesn't deliver the goods, its time to move to Platform
B. You can't weigh on a single resource. Patience is good but it needs to
be aimed. A friend may not respond, try for another. Life has a strange pattern;
you may never know what may click next.
- Infinite patience: Patience is the key to
everything. You cannot expect spontaneous results. Things take time. You
never lose, you always gain something. Your project A failed, but you
gained experience. Experience, valuable enough to implement Project B.
- Don't be afraid: The major cause of setbacks and
doubts is the inability to start. Every human is afraid to start or take a
step. A baby is afraid to walk, but learns to step. Start slowly; take a
deep breath and one step at a time.
- Fight or Flight: Life doesn't bring things easy. Even a child born
with silver spoon in his mouth needs to fight for it. A prime minister’s
son doesn't make him the next candidate, and if it does he still needs to
work for it. It's easy to criticise but difficult to execute. You need to
understand when to fight and when to stall. A victor is one who fights and
stalls at the right time.
- Don't guess: Making unnecessary guesses makes things
difficult. You may analyse a situation and determine possibilities but
that is different from making wild guesses. There is always a thin line
between analysing situations and making a guess work. There are times when
people mistake it for intuition.
- Release your adrenaline: Whenever in a stress,
release adrenaline. Working out helps a person and keeps the mind
occupied. Remember, an empty mind is a Devil's workshop.
- Don't
be a judge: I
called him/her and he/she doesn't call me back. It maybe your everyday
life situation, a private or professional affair. But it doesn't let you
judge a person. Everyone has a different life that they may get busy with.
You expected attention from a person while you neglected the other who was
busy reaching you. We humans are weird specie; we complain for what's
not ours but neglect what we have.
Stop judging people. You can always observe not judge. There's always two side to a coin and three facades to a story: yours, mine and the truth.